When did that happen?

Cameron will be 15 next month. He reminded me of that the other day. He wants to take driver's education this summer. Laws are changing, and he has to have his permit by July 1 (which means he needs to be enrolled in a class) or he must wait an additional 6 months. Now I'm looking into driver's education for our second son as our first son will be leaving home.

Oh yeah, and Emma asked me yesterday how she, Christopher, and Cameron got into my belly.

They grow up so fast.

Watching and waiting

So, Sunday was Pher's birthday. We had t-bone steaks, baked sweet potatoes, green beans, fetuccine alfredo, biscuits, and chocolate trifle. On Wednesday when I came home from work, he was warming t-bone leftovers. He was also sauteeing peppers, onions, and mushrooms to go with his t-bone scraps.

This morning he missed the school bus. He came home and asked me for a ride. No problem. Be ready in three minutes. Four minutes later, I hollered for him. Nothing. I hollered again. Nothing. I screamed for him and got a 'What?" in return. I told him it was time to leave "NOW." He told me that if I was worried about being late to work that I should just leave without him and he would ride a bike. That's exactly what I did. I left him to ride a bike.

Fast forward five hours. I had a post-surgical appointment (yeah I'm fine and my belly is going to continue to be uncomfortable for a few months), and Todd met me at the doctor's office. I asked him if Pher made it home from school safely on the bike. He told me that his return trip was no problem... since he didn't embark on his journey to school in the first place. "It was too cold" so he asked Dad to give him a ride to school. Todd also told me that after he picked him up from school, Pher decided to make as close to homemade spaghetti sauce as he could. He opened a can of diced tomatoes, and he did more sauteeing of fresh veggies.

At this point we looked at each other and smiled. Our oldest son does have some strong beliefs. He does not like capitalism. He does not like material possessions. He does not believe in "organized" anything. However... he has proven that he does like to be warm and he does like food in his belly.

He doesn't read the blog. He is anti-blog. Please don't mention this to him. I'm putting this out there so you guys know what is going on here. We are watching and waiting. He may decide to leave and wander. I would be surprised if he didn't leave. We are praying that the love, warmth, and easy access to food brings him home quickly and safely. Especially safely.

Birthday symbolism

On the evening of April 22 Pher told me that he doesn't think he's ready for college. The visit to Beloit College was great. The school is great. The campus is great. The students and faculty that he met were great. He's just not ready to go. It's not that he's not ready academically. He's always been advanced academically. It's that he's not ready psychologically. By his own admission, he loves to learn. He devours knowledge, but he wants it on his own terms right now. He told me that he can't decide what he wants to be "when he grows up" if he doesn't know who he really is... now. I remember feeling that way. I remember feeling lost. I remember feeling helpless.

Turns out what he wants to do is wander. He wants to wander until he feels satisfied. He wants to bike or hike until he feels as though the void in his life has been filled. Of course I want to fill this void with dinner, cakes, hugs, kisses, and I love you's. He wants to learn what it's like to be completely dependent on himself. I wasn't feeling all warm and fuzzy inside after this conversation.

Now only people who were close to us when Christopher was a baby will remember this: We decorated the nursery with lambs. Remember this as you read on, because when I put it all together on the morning of Sunday the 25th, I felt like a weight had been lifted.

On Saturday the 24th, Todd and I went to a silent auction and dinner for the LAMB organization. Dr. Jane Weaver (general surgeon) comes into town once or twice a year. She has to make these return visits in order to maintain her affiliation and credentials with Indiana Surgical Specialists. Todd knows her from the floor at Parkview. One of her partners did my hernia repair surgery. She has a medical facility in San Lorenzo, Ecuador that not only heals the body but also the spirit. The Latin American Mission Board or LAMB.

On Sunday the 25th (Christopher's birthday), we were handed bulletins as we walked into church. I didn't pay any attention to the picture on the front of the bulletin (see picture above). Todd turned his head to me, leaned to my ear, and said, "Look at the picture on the front on the bulletin on our boy's birthday."... It was a lamb. The gospel lesson preached was John 10: 22-30. The verses that brought tears to my eyes were 27 & 28: "My sheep hear my voice. I know them and they follow me. I give them eternal life and they shall never perish. No one will snatch them out of my hand."

Is this a coincidence or is it God telling us to remember that He is in charge? The theme of the lambs over his birthday weekend and after the emotional disclosure was indeed Divine Intervention. Todd and I needn't worry. God has this one. We need to give them both time to work through it. Pher needs to wander and God needs to guide. We can do nothing except let go and give them room.

This is going to take a lot of patience and patience is not one of my strong points. Pray for me please.

The return trip

So, Monday around 3:00 I get a phone call from Todd. He received a phone call from Christopher. Apparently Christopher received a text message from Amtrak indicating that his return train was cancelled due to a "service disruption." The text instructed to call an "800" number. So, the boy called his dad, then his dad called me, only to ask me what to do. How about calling the "800" number guys? Oh wait, never mind, I'm Mom and I will handle it for both of you since you know how to call each other and me but not follow the simple instruction given by Amtrak's courtesy text. Yeah, I'm slightly annoyed.

I called the "800" number. The Amtrak customer service representative told me that there was a freight train derailment in Bryan, OH. Since the disruption is further east than Christopher's stop, she instructed me to have him leave Beloit College and head to Union Station in Chicago to catch his train. I called Pher, gave him the instructions, and all was well...

... Until 8:30 Fort Wayne time (7:30 Chicago time) when I received a phone call from Christopher telling me that the train is indeed cancelled and they told him that he's now stranded in Chicago. They don't know when rail service will begin because it was a HAZMAT spill on the tracks, over 20 rail cars involved, and damage to the tracks. So, I'm in Fort Wayne, Todd's in class until 9:50, and Christopher is stranded in Chicago. I called Amtrak. They do not offer alternate transportation or accommodations for distressed passengers, but they gave me my $26 for the ticket. Somehow that didn't offer much stress relief. Now I'm really annoyed.

I called Pher. No answer. I texted Pher. No response. I called again. No answer. Again. No answer. Again... and no answer. I gave him about 30 minutes and called again. He picked up. "Why the hell haven't you answered your phone? I'm freaking out here. You're stuck in Chicago!" He said, "Don't worry, Momma. I'm fine. You freak out too easy. Cool, there's a statue of Christopher Columbus!"

Turns out he was walking around Navy Pier, the parks, the museums, the labyrinth of skyscrapers, in downtown Chicago at around 9:30 at night. He's feeling great about it. I'm ready to vomit.

Rational Barb must have slapped me, because I suddenly remembered that Todd has a cousin that lives in Chicago. I called him. He's in the western suburbs, but he will gladly go and pick Christopher up and bring him to his house. Then I remembered a friend from high school (who we saw the Saturday before this). Todd has her number. He called her as soon as he got out of class. She lives in Indiana just east of Chicago. She took down Pher's cell, Todd called Pher with her cell, she drove to Chicago and rescued Pher from the streets. Todd drove to her home and brought him back home to us. Safe and sound.

His only response was... "Downtown Chicago sucks but the parks are nice."

More on his Beloit visit later...

The beginning or the end?

I took Pher to the Amtrak station in Waterloo this morning. He jumped out of the van with a "Thanks for the ride. Love you, Momma!" and then jumped on the train handing the conductor his ticket. Just. Like. That.

That was it. He's on his way to Beloit College for the Senior visit days today and tomorrow. Either this will be the first of many trips he makes between Waterloo and Beloit... or it will be his last. It's his decision. We can't control it. It is out of our hands and placed into his. During this trip he will decide his future.

It was so much easier when I was wiping his newborn butt and making all decisions for him.

Life Mural

We stumbled upon a phenomenal guitar player probably 3 years ago. His name is Michael Kelsey. We saw him at a bar. We've seen him at that same bar 3 or 4 times. He's usually a 1-man show. Michael, his electronic equipment, and his guitar. With the looping equipment he has, he sounds like a full band.

We have also seen him twice at churches. His shows as churches are for "all ages" and so of course we brought children. Emma loves, loves, loves, his CD titled Gruvency. Loves it. She has a favorite song titled, 'Life Mural.' When we saw Michael (she calls him Mr. Kelsey) at a church near our home, it was a little over a year ago. That little girl marched right up to him and asked him to play 'Life Mural.' He told her that he was wondering what to open the show with and she had just solved his problem.

We saw him again last Friday. He played at Come2Go (C2G) Ministries in downtown Fort Wayne. His music is not spiritual or religious. I think he likes the churchy venues for all-ages shows. Also, he seems to be a super, super nice guy, and was probably raised in a home that attended church (just speculation). Todd asked Emma if she wanted to ask him to play 'Life Mural' again. She wanted to ask him, but this time around she was too shy to just march up to him. Leave it to Daddy. He went and started talking to Michael. Emma slid up by Daddy, and Michael remembered her. He remembered her. He remembered that he met us at "that other church he played in Fort Wayne." He remembered that Emma had requested 'Life Mural.' He opened this show with this song again... for her.

Our little girl is enamored with this guitar-playing fellow. It's a really good thing that she is not old enough to go into bars. I think we have a groupie on our hands.By the way, the drum set in the picture is the church's. He did not play it.... And he autographed her shoe... And they both wear Chuck Taylor's. How cool is that?!

Spring Break 2010

Here's what Spring Break brought for our family:
Pher--
A Senior Year Spring Break trip was in order. (I did not have the luxury of this. I remember many, many classmates did go on Spring Break trips. I don't remember why I didn't go, and truth be told, I'm none the worse for it.) Pher, Zeke, and three other friends (don't know who... DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHO) went to Shawnee National Park in southern Illinois. He was very, very excited (and that's an understatement about his excitement). He got out his Boy Scout equipment. Grandma & Grandpa Misterka gave him a water purifier for a gift this past Christmas. He was like a kid in a toy store when he was talking about using that thing. Their water was going to be 'safe.' He filled his internal frame backpack with his tent, sleeping sack, cooking/eating equipment, and food. He packed only what was necessary. Zeke picked him up on Sunday. We heard from him Monday morning. They made it safely. The last words he said were, "I love you, Momma."

Go have fun my child. This is the last chance for you to be a kid in an adult's body.

Cameron--
Cameron did what Cameron does best. He had a friend spend the night for a couple nights. He then went to that friend's house for a couple of nights. Then he went to another friend's house for a couple of nights. We got him back on Friday morning. He ate, showered, and did laundry. It's nice to know we are needed!

Emma-
Sweet Emma Carole spent the week with Aunt Marla. She had Aunt Marla all to herself from Easter Sunday evening until Tuesday night. On Tuesday night, Emma's cousin and best friend Katie came to visit Aunt Marla also. So that means that Aunt Marla had the excitement of both Emma and Katie all day Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. By the way, Aunt Marla is a saint in layman's clothes.

The absence of children made for a quiet Spring Break around the Meyers' house. It was nice since I'm a week post-op. It was nice in that sense only. I had plenty of opportunity to rest and that was greatly needed and appreciated. Let me tell you... If this is what "empty nest" is like, I'm not ready for it. I would rather have all of the noise and confusion that comes with three kids, two parents, and active schedules. Please give me the chaos instead of the quiet. It has been a L.O.N.G week.

I'm Back

I know it's been a week since I've given you guys an update. Here's what has been going on:

Although I was in the hospital for only two days, this surgery exhausted me. I didn't have the energy to sit at the computer. Pretty sad when you don't have the energy to sit and type, isn't it? Also, this surgery hurt... a lot. Granted, it did not hurt as much as #1 last year, but it did hurt much more than I anticipated. Four 1-1/2" incisions; one in each abdominal quadrant. When I told Todd that I was surprised at the pain level (we were in bed) he explained it to me this way: Pretend this bed is your abdomen. Your abdominal cavity is the space under the bed. They had to blow your abdominal cavity up with air (like lifting the bed up) in order to give the surgeon enough room to work through those FOUR incisions he made. He tightly rolled up a 6"x8" piece of mesh to adhere to the inside of your abdominal cavity. So I have, not just one big incision but FOUR smaller ones that (when added together) are almost the same length as the large mid-line incisions you had last year. I love it and I hate it when he explains things in a way that even I can understand.